The fellow who dug my well, I guess you might say he did the work indirectly, came back late last week and did a little more work for me. When I say he did the well indirectly, I mean that he had some of his ‘people' do it. When you have money, you can also have your own ‘people.' When you don't have money, you have to be your own person, I guess. Besides, I am about all the people I can keep up with anyway. As for the work he did this time, he dug me a trench in which to bury my still uninstalled water line. He told me he would install the tank, pump and line for $1,500. I opted against that method, especially knowing that I can do the work for about one-third that much.

After all that, I shouldn't have been surprised when I pulled into the driveway Saturday and saw that instead of your standard dead grass and gravel I had a swimming pool. You see, I could have already had the line in if I had bitten the financial bullet. I sometimes wonder if it is wise to be a bit on the frugal side. In one way, it causes more problems than it fixes. Then again, I can't really afford to be any other way.

Looking across the trench, with claw marks on the sides from the backhoe, I couldn't tell how big it was. Judging from the top part, which happened to be uphill from the pool, I would guess the depth at about three feet. At the ‘pool end,' it was completely full of water to the top. Add in the fact that the trench was about 30 inches wide, and you have several square feet of water to contend with. After some figuring, I decided that I might could install the water line in one week with the assistance of scuba gear. Snorkeling, anyone?

The yard itself is now decorated with massive piles of shale and dirt, heaped up beside the big trench turned pool.

I was thinking to myself that just filling those back in with dirt may be more than I can do by myself, let alone finding a way to remove several hundred gallons of water from the inside with rain still falling gently upon my head. The raindrops were making little ripples on the muddy water in the trench, just adding to the mounting problem. The rain just wasn't cooperating with my efforts to install the lines.

For a short time, I toyed with the idea of using a bucket to dip out the water, but two things stopped me.

First of all, the thought of going into that muddy ditch of unknown depth and content was not an appealing one. Secondly, a large rain cloud rolled over about the time I thought that and drops of water began to spatter in the ditch and surrounding mud, sending off little splats of mud and water that sent me running for cover.

Inside the house, I found another task that needed doing. It was time to move the tools and other assorted building stuff out of the living room floor. It took about three hours just to sort the stuff into general categories, like fishing stuff, plumbing stuff, electrical stuff and tools.

Then moving all of it out to the building was another job in and of itself, especially with maneuvering over the ditch to consider. Why I hadn't already done this job earlier is beyond my comprehension.

Instead, I waited until I could walk across the open span, with water beneath like a pit, along a 10-inch wide board. Adding to my fun, the board was also slippery with mud and rain water after my first trip across. It didn't make it any easier, but it did make it more interesting.

You would expect me to write about falling into the water and mud, but it never happened. For once, good fortune smiled upon me.

Having a water-filled trench running the length of your front yard really does make life difficult to deal with, but it is still much easier to deal with the results of digging than it is to deal with the actual work of the digging. I don't think I am physically able to dig a 70 foot trench, three feet deep and that wide, too. I would probably try to just do the first six feet or so and go ahead and lay down in it.

Maybe I could have found someone to push a little dirt over me.

I guess I will just wait now until the water evaporates, soaks in or does whatever else water likes to do. Then I can get back on my mission to have water in the house.

Electricity is much closer along these days. The meter base and electricity shut off are installed on the pole outside the trailer. So I will soon have all of the little amenities so many of us take for granted daily. I know I don't even think about it until I go over there to stay for awhile.

Once the switch is on, I am sure that my first priorities will be simple — adding things like electric lights and running water. I guess I am finally leaving the Stone Age and entering into the Technology Age in one giant leap.

Later, my needs will grow, I am sure. It always happens. One day you find yourself opening a can with a machine and wondering, "Where is that thing I used to use with the little turn handle on it?"

Right now I can go over there and enjoy peace and quiet, with no humming appliances, no ringing telephones and no blaring televisions. Of course, I have power at my apartment here in Sparta but I don't have a blaring television there either. I swore off the TV. I think it is a bad influence on me.

But not counting the television, I will still have other major changes to deal with, like outdoor lighting, digital alarm clocks, night lights, circular saws, telephone service and a radio. I do miss refrigeration and running water when I spend time over there. It is hard to figure out how to keep things cold without spending a small fortune in ice and constantly draining out the water to make sure the bologna doesn't end up going for a swim. Maybe I can install a board for the bologna to walk across.

Anyway, it sounds like this electricity stuff is going to ruin everything.

I probably won't even go there any more. I'll just rent it to someone else and let them worry about it. And they call this making improvements?

Get more tongue in cheek commentary this week's issue of the Alleghany News!

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